So do mom's ever get a real sick day?? I have watched my whole family get the "crud" the past couple of weeks, and I have been there at their beck and call for whatever they needed. I have gotten up in the middle of the night with sick ones, I have made "sick" beds on the couch, I have made hot tea, etc. I get so lucky to start feeling the crud creep up on me Friday night (while I was wearing the hottest shirt ever!!! You know it Kendra!! LOL). I was hoping a hot cup of tea would make me feel better, but it didn't. I woke up yesterday with my skin crawling, so I hoped that some Advil would make me feel better, it was only temporary. I carried on with my day. I didn't stop my "motherly" duties. I didn't have anyone to give me a wet rag, or to leave me to my room alone while I try and sleep, I even made my OWN hot tea. I get home last night after furniture shopping (because Anna really needs new bedroom furniture, and like I said--the day didn't stop), and as soon as the kids were in bed, I crashed. I was not feeling well. I wake up this morning, and I have no voice!!! You all know me, I LOVE to talk!!! This is killing me!!! I have my peeps that I have to talk to daily, and it is hard to whisper on the phone!! Well, I did get to have the morning to myself. Steve was kind enough to take all 3 kiddos to church. I just laid on the couch, and I felt so guilty!! I had dirty dishes in the sink along with a small pile of laundry needing to be folded. Honestly, I didn't have it in me to do a thing. I had the chance to actually be take a little "sick" time, and I soaked it up!!! Of course, this only lasted a couple of hours. Shortly the herd was back home, and my sick day was over. I ended up helping Steve with some yard work later this afternoon, I even half way entertained a guest. I am pooped!!! All I gotta say is there must be a special place for mom's up in Heaven. It is an exhausting job!! I love my hubby, and he is a great dad--but there are just some things that a mom does best, and kids get accustomed to that! (Possibly there is a few things I could let slip...) So I will go to bed soon, and the yard is done, the dishes are put away, and that pile of laundry--well it is still sitting there. I am hoping one day that the piles of laundry will fold themselves. That is the only house chore that I despise doing. Folding clothes...ughhh.
So goodnight all, and hopefully I will have somewhat of a voice tomorrow!!!
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Dying Easter Eggs
Dying Easter eggs as a child use to be so much fun. I could not wait to make the eggs all kinds of wonderful colors. Using the dip method of making the half and half colored eggs. This memory was brought to my attention yesterday as I was getting all of the coloring cups ready. Aubrey was helping me and she said "Dying Easter Eggs is my favorite thing to do all year." I on the other hand was not so excited to start this project. With one word why....Beau. Steve had to work, so I was doing this project alone with the 3 kids. The girls know what to do, but this was really Beau's first Easter to really have the desire to be involved.
They did a wonderful job! I love the way Easter Eggs look. They are so bright and colorful!! Hopefully next Easter we will have more success in getting the youngest up to speed on "How to dye Easter Eggs".
(So thanks Steve for leaving me at home all alone with the kids to dye Easter Eggs. I think I am out of town next year!!! LOL)
Friday, March 21, 2008
Wide awake!!!
So here it is 1:00 a.m and I am wide awake. I am not sure why. I am usually the one that is in bed and Steve is up late on the computer. I hate when I can't feel that tired feeling. I know if I go to bed now I will toss and turn, then I begin looking at the clock too often, and the night begins to drag. That is not fun for me. So I would rather sit here in my comfy chair and blog.
Oops! I just yawned really big. Let's see if we can get some more of those!!
I can't believe this week of Spring Break has gone by so fast. My kids have come through without any harm. It scares me actually when they start getting along and playing together. We had one little spat this afternoon. Aubrey has a doll, Happy, who has been around for years. She was a little doll that we got for $1.00 at a garage sale, and Aubrey loves this doll. Happy has been everywhere, and to the thanks of Steve and I, we have never left the doll anywhere!
Oops! I just yawned really big. Let's see if we can get some more of those!!
I can't believe this week of Spring Break has gone by so fast. My kids have come through without any harm. It scares me actually when they start getting along and playing together. We had one little spat this afternoon. Aubrey has a doll, Happy, who has been around for years. She was a little doll that we got for $1.00 at a garage sale, and Aubrey loves this doll. Happy has been everywhere, and to the thanks of Steve and I, we have never left the doll anywhere!
So you can see that Happy is very loved, and the thought of Happy being "gone" is unthinkable to Aubrey. Well today she got mad at Anna and threw Happy at Anna and the doll hit Anna in the head. So Steve told her that is was time to throw Happy away--the wailing that was going on was unbelieveable. I told him to give that doll back quickly, we were so close to needing therapy for her!! Don't mess with Happy!!!!
Ok, I think I am going to try and close my eyes now........
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Therapy Cleaning
Warning--I have reached sappy in this blog......
Lord knows I needed a therapy clean day. It has been an emotional 24 hours, and I just needed to take some time to myself today and clean. I know for many of you this would not be your idea of therapy, but it is for me. I get in there and start cleaning and it takes my mind to a more calm place. A place where I can see the big picture. It stops me from going into the pity mode, which is always a good thing.
Today I just needed to get lost in a project, and there is nothing better than using the vacuum cleaner to drown your thoughts. Now my house was in need of a good sweeping for sure. I was deep into the therapy today. I was moving furniture to clean underneath. I even cleaned out the cabinets in the kitchen. You know the type of cabinets that are up in the corners, where you tend to store "stuff". I am not sure I have cleaned those corners since we moved in. I had pots and pans that have not seen the light of day in years, a coffee maker that I am sure did not work, a few cookie sheets that were all beat up, other appliances that were rather dated, and old--and we have already replace. I filled up 4 trash bags full of this stuff to put on the side of the road!! It felt really good to purge. I then moved onto the rest of the house. Somehow when I get busy in these "cleaning" project, I am able to focus on what is good and what is important to me. To reflect on the here and now. So now my house is really clean, as Aubrey said I did my spring cleaning today.
So after a full day of therapy--I gotta say I do feel a bit better. I am not all happy happy joy joy yet, but I will get there without a doubt.
Oh, you say you wanted to know why I am in need of such deep therapy today?? Well, without getting into "detail", let's just say that the path that we thought God was taking us down hit a dead end, and hard I might add. So that makes me wonder, were we (and I say we, because Steve and I are a team, right?!?), so were we on the right path? Had we misread this great opportunity to be not the right thing? Apparently!!! God made that very clear that this was not His plan. Ha, don't you know God must get tired of hitting us in the face to get us back where we belong!!! So life is going to be good. There are plenty of other doors out there, we just aren't sure which one will open. So the story continues--right?
I gotta say--THANK GOD FOR GOOD FRIENDS!!! There is nothing better than getting with some of your best friends and shooting the breeze and eating some good grub. Could you ever imagine life without a true friend?? Through the years I have learned what it takes to be a true friend, and to know who your true friends are. During my "therapy" I got to thinking about friends. Thinking about the many friends through the years that have been there through all the many milestones in ones life. To say the least, I am very grateful for my friends.
Ok, so now I have to go a little sappy, and I keep trying to not say this, but it is pressing on my heartstrings, so I think I will get this out there, and then be done!!! Rebuilding a relationship with a friend can sometimes be hard, awkward, unnerving, all those things that make you nervous every time you are around. Making sure you are saying the right thing, so not to go back to that dark place you once were, and so on. I have been given the chance to rebuild a friendship of late that has been so God sent. Never in a million trillion years did I ever think I would be given the chance again--and then one day the door flew open and a world of opportunities came flying in. I have realized how much I needed her (them) and how much I have missed and vice verse. As my hubby likes to say "We were on a break". Not once have I been afraid that we will ever go back there, because the bond that has binded now, has binded with cement glue!!! God is so good to give you back the people you love!! So for anyone still reading this mess--NEVER take for granted a true friend!! Sometimes there are issues, and sometimes we get mean, but in the end--the love is always there. When you can be a part for 6 years and come together again and basically pick up where you left off (just in a much more mature fashion) and never stop a beat--you know that we you have can never be measured!!
So thanks K--You will never know how thankful I am for you!!!!! (I am even thankful for your hubby too...hehe)
Ok, so the sappiness is over. I just had to get that off my chest and post it I guess. Ok self, can I move on now?? So today was a gloomy one. Lots of good therapy came out of it, and I am looking forward to a bright and sunny day tomorrow!!!
So good night all and may you all have sweet dreams!!!
Lord knows I needed a therapy clean day. It has been an emotional 24 hours, and I just needed to take some time to myself today and clean. I know for many of you this would not be your idea of therapy, but it is for me. I get in there and start cleaning and it takes my mind to a more calm place. A place where I can see the big picture. It stops me from going into the pity mode, which is always a good thing.
Today I just needed to get lost in a project, and there is nothing better than using the vacuum cleaner to drown your thoughts. Now my house was in need of a good sweeping for sure. I was deep into the therapy today. I was moving furniture to clean underneath. I even cleaned out the cabinets in the kitchen. You know the type of cabinets that are up in the corners, where you tend to store "stuff". I am not sure I have cleaned those corners since we moved in. I had pots and pans that have not seen the light of day in years, a coffee maker that I am sure did not work, a few cookie sheets that were all beat up, other appliances that were rather dated, and old--and we have already replace. I filled up 4 trash bags full of this stuff to put on the side of the road!! It felt really good to purge. I then moved onto the rest of the house. Somehow when I get busy in these "cleaning" project, I am able to focus on what is good and what is important to me. To reflect on the here and now. So now my house is really clean, as Aubrey said I did my spring cleaning today.
So after a full day of therapy--I gotta say I do feel a bit better. I am not all happy happy joy joy yet, but I will get there without a doubt.
Oh, you say you wanted to know why I am in need of such deep therapy today?? Well, without getting into "detail", let's just say that the path that we thought God was taking us down hit a dead end, and hard I might add. So that makes me wonder, were we (and I say we, because Steve and I are a team, right?!?), so were we on the right path? Had we misread this great opportunity to be not the right thing? Apparently!!! God made that very clear that this was not His plan. Ha, don't you know God must get tired of hitting us in the face to get us back where we belong!!! So life is going to be good. There are plenty of other doors out there, we just aren't sure which one will open. So the story continues--right?
I gotta say--THANK GOD FOR GOOD FRIENDS!!! There is nothing better than getting with some of your best friends and shooting the breeze and eating some good grub. Could you ever imagine life without a true friend?? Through the years I have learned what it takes to be a true friend, and to know who your true friends are. During my "therapy" I got to thinking about friends. Thinking about the many friends through the years that have been there through all the many milestones in ones life. To say the least, I am very grateful for my friends.
Ok, so now I have to go a little sappy, and I keep trying to not say this, but it is pressing on my heartstrings, so I think I will get this out there, and then be done!!! Rebuilding a relationship with a friend can sometimes be hard, awkward, unnerving, all those things that make you nervous every time you are around. Making sure you are saying the right thing, so not to go back to that dark place you once were, and so on. I have been given the chance to rebuild a friendship of late that has been so God sent. Never in a million trillion years did I ever think I would be given the chance again--and then one day the door flew open and a world of opportunities came flying in. I have realized how much I needed her (them) and how much I have missed and vice verse. As my hubby likes to say "We were on a break". Not once have I been afraid that we will ever go back there, because the bond that has binded now, has binded with cement glue!!! God is so good to give you back the people you love!! So for anyone still reading this mess--NEVER take for granted a true friend!! Sometimes there are issues, and sometimes we get mean, but in the end--the love is always there. When you can be a part for 6 years and come together again and basically pick up where you left off (just in a much more mature fashion) and never stop a beat--you know that we you have can never be measured!!
So thanks K--You will never know how thankful I am for you!!!!! (I am even thankful for your hubby too...hehe)
Ok, so the sappiness is over. I just had to get that off my chest and post it I guess. Ok self, can I move on now?? So today was a gloomy one. Lots of good therapy came out of it, and I am looking forward to a bright and sunny day tomorrow!!!
So good night all and may you all have sweet dreams!!!
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
The Rain :(
I normally love the rain. To sit in the house on a cloudy day and watch a good movie all snuggled on the couch while you hear the pitter patter of the rain hit the windows. Your eyes begin to close so slowly, and before you know it, you have fallen into a peaceful sleep. Oh, how I miss those days.....Now that there are 3 kids involved, a rainy day means kids are stuck in the house all day and that will mean that some sort of blood will be shed between them over something so minor, yet rather major.
We had plans to go camping this week!!! We were so excited. Steve got this huge tent for Christmas and we are dying to go camping and test it out. This tent is like a house!!! Well, we have decided that we are no longer going to plan to go on a camping trip. Every time we do, the weather has other plans. I took the week off from work this week to so that we could enjoy the great outdoors and I don't have to worry about my cell phone ringing, or an employee needing me for some problem that I need to fix. Just the 5 of us enjoying some good camp out food, rest and relaxation.... That did not happen!! The rain will not stop!!!
So anyway, we could have gone Sunday night since the rain was not coming until Monday, but Steve had a job interview in the morning. So we didn't go. Then we thought how fun it would be to go ahead and go, and listen to the rain--it would be fun I told Steve if there were not little kids involved. They don't know how to enjoy the pleasures of the rain like adults can!!!
So we are home. Stuck inside. So here I am off work, and I am using the time to get caught up on laundry, cleaning out the fridge, cleaning out closets. The kids have worked in a few board games. So far, no one has been injured by the other yet, so that is a good. I just hope the rain decides to let up long enough for us to enjoy this spring break!!!
I am taking this time this week to spend some time with friends that I am not able to do much of during the week with school and work. I had lunch with some friends today and all of our kids. 3 adults and 7 kids. That sounds like a nightmare, but we all had a great time. The 5 girls sat a table by themselves while the 2 little boys set with the adults. We had lots of food sharing going on between the 2 tables, lots of giggly girls (I love to hear girls giggle!!) and then lots of Beau wanting to get out of his highchair to get to the girls. When I finally let him go sit at the table with the girls, he was so proud. We had a really great time.
Of course, as it is close to time to leave, the rain begins to pick up. We run to the car (we did have umbrellas, but the rain was blowing sideways, so the umbrellas were not helping much) and there is a car parked so close to the driver side, there is no way I am going to be able to squeeze through and get Beau in his seat, so we all get in the car on the passenger side. As I am getting the kids in and about to climb in the car myself, the wind blows so hard that the umbrella turns in side out. Of course it one of those big ones, and I can't get it fixed. (At this point if anyone had been watching this, I know they were laughing). I would get half of the umbrella fixed but never could get the whole thing to pop back. By the time I finally got the darn thing fixed, I was drenched. Oh the joys of the rain--right?!?!
Well, that is all I have for today's blog. I will sure to be back on this week!! Enjoy the rain!!!!!
We had plans to go camping this week!!! We were so excited. Steve got this huge tent for Christmas and we are dying to go camping and test it out. This tent is like a house!!! Well, we have decided that we are no longer going to plan to go on a camping trip. Every time we do, the weather has other plans. I took the week off from work this week to so that we could enjoy the great outdoors and I don't have to worry about my cell phone ringing, or an employee needing me for some problem that I need to fix. Just the 5 of us enjoying some good camp out food, rest and relaxation.... That did not happen!! The rain will not stop!!!
So anyway, we could have gone Sunday night since the rain was not coming until Monday, but Steve had a job interview in the morning. So we didn't go. Then we thought how fun it would be to go ahead and go, and listen to the rain--it would be fun I told Steve if there were not little kids involved. They don't know how to enjoy the pleasures of the rain like adults can!!!
So we are home. Stuck inside. So here I am off work, and I am using the time to get caught up on laundry, cleaning out the fridge, cleaning out closets. The kids have worked in a few board games. So far, no one has been injured by the other yet, so that is a good. I just hope the rain decides to let up long enough for us to enjoy this spring break!!!
I am taking this time this week to spend some time with friends that I am not able to do much of during the week with school and work. I had lunch with some friends today and all of our kids. 3 adults and 7 kids. That sounds like a nightmare, but we all had a great time. The 5 girls sat a table by themselves while the 2 little boys set with the adults. We had lots of food sharing going on between the 2 tables, lots of giggly girls (I love to hear girls giggle!!) and then lots of Beau wanting to get out of his highchair to get to the girls. When I finally let him go sit at the table with the girls, he was so proud. We had a really great time.
Of course, as it is close to time to leave, the rain begins to pick up. We run to the car (we did have umbrellas, but the rain was blowing sideways, so the umbrellas were not helping much) and there is a car parked so close to the driver side, there is no way I am going to be able to squeeze through and get Beau in his seat, so we all get in the car on the passenger side. As I am getting the kids in and about to climb in the car myself, the wind blows so hard that the umbrella turns in side out. Of course it one of those big ones, and I can't get it fixed. (At this point if anyone had been watching this, I know they were laughing). I would get half of the umbrella fixed but never could get the whole thing to pop back. By the time I finally got the darn thing fixed, I was drenched. Oh the joys of the rain--right?!?!
Well, that is all I have for today's blog. I will sure to be back on this week!! Enjoy the rain!!!!!
Friday, March 14, 2008
Tagged!!!
Ok, so I have been tagged. Haha, I am so blog illerate that I had to have Kendra explain this whole "tagging" thing.
So I have been Book Tagged.
My closest book to me actually is the Sports Illustrated 50th Anniversary book. Wouldn't you know that on page 123 is nothing but a picture of a baseball catcher standing on his head on homeplate. So I had to find the next nearest book (so that I am not "cheating" on the rules). It is the oh so exciting book I received back in November at a training I went to on Performance Management. So get ready to be inspired!!!
Zapp! The Lightning of Empowerment by William C. Byham, PH.D
(sentences 5-8)
Next he decided to share thoughts, feelings, and rationale. He carefully explained the situation and its ramifications. He apologized for not foreseeing the situation.
He said, "We will no longer be measuring increases in output.
Wow, wasn't that amazing!!!
I am so new to my blog, and I am not sure who is bored enough to read about my life, so if you are reading--YOU ARE TAGGED, except Kendra. She started this mess, LOL!!!
Here are the instructions:
Rules: "Look up from the computer, look around the room where you're sitting and pick up the closest book. And closest really means closest. No cheating by running to another room to pick out a book. Open the book, turn to page 123, count down to the fifth sentence on that page, and then post the next three sentences." Enjoy!
So I have been Book Tagged.
My closest book to me actually is the Sports Illustrated 50th Anniversary book. Wouldn't you know that on page 123 is nothing but a picture of a baseball catcher standing on his head on homeplate. So I had to find the next nearest book (so that I am not "cheating" on the rules). It is the oh so exciting book I received back in November at a training I went to on Performance Management. So get ready to be inspired!!!
Zapp! The Lightning of Empowerment by William C. Byham, PH.D
(sentences 5-8)
Next he decided to share thoughts, feelings, and rationale. He carefully explained the situation and its ramifications. He apologized for not foreseeing the situation.
He said, "We will no longer be measuring increases in output.
Wow, wasn't that amazing!!!
I am so new to my blog, and I am not sure who is bored enough to read about my life, so if you are reading--YOU ARE TAGGED, except Kendra. She started this mess, LOL!!!
Here are the instructions:
Rules: "Look up from the computer, look around the room where you're sitting and pick up the closest book. And closest really means closest. No cheating by running to another room to pick out a book. Open the book, turn to page 123, count down to the fifth sentence on that page, and then post the next three sentences." Enjoy!
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Let the poopies stop!!!
So this is where my blog is going right now. Beau has been doing lots of poops in the past 24 hours. The nurse said it is just the virus going around--but I am tired of changing the poopies!!!
He is beginning to think it is funny because he hears a toot and then runs to get a new diaper and lays on the floor. Now that tells me that the boy knows what his body is doing!!! So I have been talking a lot of going poopie in the potty. So this morning I am sitting here working (yes, I was really working) and just as I had noticed that Beau was not in the room I hear a potty flush. So as I am walking into the bathroom with the flushing potty, Beau is standing there with his eyes all bright and tells me he poopied in the potty. He was still fully dressed. So I asked him to go poopie again in the potty. He got some toilet paper and wadded it up and threw it in the potty and flushed. He looked at me again and said "I poopied in the potty!". So who knew that just throwing toilet paper in the potty took care of all those poopies!!! Just when I thought we were close to knowing what to do with the potty, I realize his concept of the potty is not quite there yet.
As for the "real" poopies, they are still a-coming!!!
He is beginning to think it is funny because he hears a toot and then runs to get a new diaper and lays on the floor. Now that tells me that the boy knows what his body is doing!!! So I have been talking a lot of going poopie in the potty. So this morning I am sitting here working (yes, I was really working) and just as I had noticed that Beau was not in the room I hear a potty flush. So as I am walking into the bathroom with the flushing potty, Beau is standing there with his eyes all bright and tells me he poopied in the potty. He was still fully dressed. So I asked him to go poopie again in the potty. He got some toilet paper and wadded it up and threw it in the potty and flushed. He looked at me again and said "I poopied in the potty!". So who knew that just throwing toilet paper in the potty took care of all those poopies!!! Just when I thought we were close to knowing what to do with the potty, I realize his concept of the potty is not quite there yet.
As for the "real" poopies, they are still a-coming!!!
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
The Biker Babes!!
Beau, Hannah, Anna Kate, Aubrey (Josh was playing trains)Our friend Rick rode his bike down to our house this weekend and the kids were all about the motorcycle. Beau kept wanting to go see the bike with the girls, but when they would get close to the front door, he would back off. Well, they all went outside, and he snuck out there thinking we were not watching. While Rick was not looking, he climbed up on the bike all by himself. He was in hog heaven!! I missed his first ride, but we couldn't get him off after that!!!
He still thought it was "oud"
Monday, March 10, 2008
Life's little blessing
So talking with some friends yesterday we got a little deep in talking about how lately a lot of life has been falling back into place.
Frienships/relationships have healed and mended, health is abundant, and the the Lord lets the most needed thing fall into the lap of my husband.
Without getting too detailed of what is going on, the Lord is mighty!! He has taken Steve and I down a long road for the past year, and we have been patient, and we have been obediant, and we have been frustrated, but through all of that we kept the faith. The Lord was in control the whole time. He knew of the timing that needed to happen. Isn't it funny when looking back you wonder why you are having to go through what you are, just to get to the other side?? Yet, the lesson being taught during that walk across the road is so priceless.
Steve had his second interview with a great company today and he has the job, he just has 2 more things to do and then they will be able to offer him the job. This is a dream job, and when we have the official word, I will post it loud and proud!!!!
Frienships/relationships have healed and mended, health is abundant, and the the Lord lets the most needed thing fall into the lap of my husband.
Without getting too detailed of what is going on, the Lord is mighty!! He has taken Steve and I down a long road for the past year, and we have been patient, and we have been obediant, and we have been frustrated, but through all of that we kept the faith. The Lord was in control the whole time. He knew of the timing that needed to happen. Isn't it funny when looking back you wonder why you are having to go through what you are, just to get to the other side?? Yet, the lesson being taught during that walk across the road is so priceless.
Steve had his second interview with a great company today and he has the job, he just has 2 more things to do and then they will be able to offer him the job. This is a dream job, and when we have the official word, I will post it loud and proud!!!!
Ok, here we go!!!!!!
So this is the new "blogging" thing! It seems a little weird to me that anyone could be reading my thoughts, but then again, I have always been an open book!! That is something that has always driven Steve nuts. I have learned to be more guarded in what I share in order to respect my one and only.
So I guess here it is like having a one sided conversation with myself here. Haha, that is funny to me. I can remember when I was younger and I would get all upset about something, and I would stand in front of the mirror and talk to myself while watching myself cry about it. My parents used to think I was just nuts, and it is funny--I have caught my own daughter doing the same thing now as she is entering her "pre-teen" years. Why do we do this?? Why do we want to watch ourselves cry? Does it help the mood? Does it give us a peace to see the hurt in our face?? Thinking back on it, I have stood in the mirror many times and cried lots of tears of pain. I am so glad that those mirrors can't talk. Possibly that is the only place we can allow ourselves to be truly vulnerable. We know that the person staring back at us isn't going to judge how we feel, that person isn't going to talk back, and that person is going to keep that moment private.
For some of you who may not know much about me. I married the love of my life back in 95. I was so young, but I was in love. I remember the first time we met, and I was literally love struck. He felt the same, from what he has said. We hit it off, and I remember on our 2nd date, he leaned over to me while we were at the Hockey game and told me he was going to marry me. In an odd way, it did not scare me in the least bit. Which I thought was soo odd. I had dated a guy my senior year in high school that I thought was love, and when he started talking about marriage, I freaked and he was out. So you can see why I was shocked that this did not scare me (I was older too.) We were rarely a part. We did everything together, and had a blast. I guess when things were getting really serious, he froze. He broke up with me on my mom's 40th birthday. I was heart broken. It came from no where. I remember I called in to work the next day, I was too upset to even function--this was a new drama for me at that time of my life. He had truly broken my heart. I had some great friends. They helped heal those wounds, and got me back into the swing of life. It had been a few weeks since Steve and I had talked, and I went out with some friends one night. I got home around 2 in the morning, and my dad was still up (funny how he told me he was up because he couldn't sleep, although now as a parent looking back, he was always up when I got home regardless of the time with some excuse as to why he was still up--lol) So my dad tells me that Steve had been calling my phone all night (I had my own phone line, and the old kind of answer machine where you could hear all over the house). He had let me know that he finally answered and let Steve know I was not at home but out with some friends. Well, when I had checked, I had 14 calls from him that night. That was the beginning of our relationhip once again. Little did I know that at the time he was just freaking out because he had realized where our level of relationhip had reached, and it scared him so he thought it was just better to end it. Three months later, on New Years Eve right at midnight, Steve asked me to marry him. I could not believe it. I was shocked, I was excited, it was the best surprise ever!!! We were soo excited about the new adventure in our lives. I wanted a summer wedding, but my parents felt it best if we waited a little longer. We got married Dec. 16, 1995, 16 days before my 21st birthday. The wedding was beautiful, and was over in a flash it seems. We had a great first night as a married couple, we order a pizza and watched Willy Wonka in the hotel room. We got up early the next morning to get to the airport to go to Disney World. What a Honeymoon. Disney knows how to make the time magical for newleyweds!!!
Wow, I didn't mean to go into my life story--so I will stop the bore now. Maybe I will leave it there and pick it back up another time. So for now....more to come!!!
So I guess here it is like having a one sided conversation with myself here. Haha, that is funny to me. I can remember when I was younger and I would get all upset about something, and I would stand in front of the mirror and talk to myself while watching myself cry about it. My parents used to think I was just nuts, and it is funny--I have caught my own daughter doing the same thing now as she is entering her "pre-teen" years. Why do we do this?? Why do we want to watch ourselves cry? Does it help the mood? Does it give us a peace to see the hurt in our face?? Thinking back on it, I have stood in the mirror many times and cried lots of tears of pain. I am so glad that those mirrors can't talk. Possibly that is the only place we can allow ourselves to be truly vulnerable. We know that the person staring back at us isn't going to judge how we feel, that person isn't going to talk back, and that person is going to keep that moment private.
For some of you who may not know much about me. I married the love of my life back in 95. I was so young, but I was in love. I remember the first time we met, and I was literally love struck. He felt the same, from what he has said. We hit it off, and I remember on our 2nd date, he leaned over to me while we were at the Hockey game and told me he was going to marry me. In an odd way, it did not scare me in the least bit. Which I thought was soo odd. I had dated a guy my senior year in high school that I thought was love, and when he started talking about marriage, I freaked and he was out. So you can see why I was shocked that this did not scare me (I was older too.) We were rarely a part. We did everything together, and had a blast. I guess when things were getting really serious, he froze. He broke up with me on my mom's 40th birthday. I was heart broken. It came from no where. I remember I called in to work the next day, I was too upset to even function--this was a new drama for me at that time of my life. He had truly broken my heart. I had some great friends. They helped heal those wounds, and got me back into the swing of life. It had been a few weeks since Steve and I had talked, and I went out with some friends one night. I got home around 2 in the morning, and my dad was still up (funny how he told me he was up because he couldn't sleep, although now as a parent looking back, he was always up when I got home regardless of the time with some excuse as to why he was still up--lol) So my dad tells me that Steve had been calling my phone all night (I had my own phone line, and the old kind of answer machine where you could hear all over the house). He had let me know that he finally answered and let Steve know I was not at home but out with some friends. Well, when I had checked, I had 14 calls from him that night. That was the beginning of our relationhip once again. Little did I know that at the time he was just freaking out because he had realized where our level of relationhip had reached, and it scared him so he thought it was just better to end it. Three months later, on New Years Eve right at midnight, Steve asked me to marry him. I could not believe it. I was shocked, I was excited, it was the best surprise ever!!! We were soo excited about the new adventure in our lives. I wanted a summer wedding, but my parents felt it best if we waited a little longer. We got married Dec. 16, 1995, 16 days before my 21st birthday. The wedding was beautiful, and was over in a flash it seems. We had a great first night as a married couple, we order a pizza and watched Willy Wonka in the hotel room. We got up early the next morning to get to the airport to go to Disney World. What a Honeymoon. Disney knows how to make the time magical for newleyweds!!!
Wow, I didn't mean to go into my life story--so I will stop the bore now. Maybe I will leave it there and pick it back up another time. So for now....more to come!!!